Another belief of the natives of Mindoro that I recently discovered is that when a woman does not tell her husband that the child she bears is not his, the woman will die because the baby will never come out. This belief, though erroneous, helps the woman to avoid adultery because of the fear of death. At least it frightens them to be repentant, and then face the husband’s wrath.
I learned about this when we visited the Sulong-Ipil village and met Lina. We asked her how many children they have. She said seven. With their situation, seven is a “multitude.” We advised her to consider undergoing tubal ligation. She quickly responded, “Oh, I have to ask my husband first.” I said to myself, “Of course,” but instead I asked her quizzically, “Why? With all of your seven children of course he will say yes.” I was so surprised when she gave me her answer.
She said, “Number one, my husband might want more children, and if he can’t have them with me, he might find someone in my place. Number two, he might think I want the ligation so I may have no fear and I may do whatever I want without him knowing.”
My first instinct was to laugh loud when I heard her air her first reason. That was the answer I didn’t expect and it was somewhat very irregular for me. But, for her, she meant it and her seriousness pierced my heart instead. It greatly shocked me. It told me that they do not see their children perishing without their basic needs being met as unusual; almost all the villagers have the same situation.
What we shared with her is that God’s design for us is to have only one mate. Everyone should be faithful to their mate that we may have peace in our families. Ligation or any other means should not be thought of as the spark of unfaithfulness. But, what’s in my conscience is a challenge to do my job, to be so close to them, that I may tell them how important it is to care for the precious gifts that God so entrusted them to protect. After they know, may they no longer think of crowding the world with hungry mouths.